Do you remember?

She flinched, holding her stance as she pointed the gun at him.

“Remember what?” she asked sharply, her grip on the gun tightening.

He smirked at her, walking closer as she held her ground.

“Our promise. Surely you didn’t forget?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Still acting like nothing happened?”

She clenched her jaw, watching him closely as he gave her a small smile.

“Nothing happened. Nothing will ever happen. You know what we have to do. We’re spies. This is our job. We forget our past and move on. We eradicate anything that will trigger those memories. Even people.”

His smile faltered as he looked away for a brief moment. “You remember it all. The promise. The kiss. Everything that happened on our last night together.”

“You have to promise me, okay? This won’t change anything between us.” she said quietly, tears running down her face.

He smiled bitterly at her, his thumb wiping away her tears. “I promise. I won’t let anything happen.”

She kissed him, the tears falling faster as he pulled her close to him. He held her until she fell asleep in his arms. The man looked down at her, kissing her forehead.

“I can’t keep that promise. We’ll have to face each other someday. And one of us will be gone.”

“We destroyed ourselves. Ruined our lives.” he whispered softly, placing the gun to her head as her eyes widened. “We can change that. We could be normal again.”

Tears welled up in her eyes as she nodded slowly. “I love you.”

The trigger went off.

He stood there, stifling a cry.

“I love you too.” he whispered, pointing the gun to his head.

I’m sorry I never kept that promise.

She smiled as he struggled to get out of the chair, the ropes around his wrists bound to it. She tugged on the blindfold teasingly, kissing him on the cheek. The girl traced his jawline as he shifted uncomfortably in the chair.

“Let me go.”

“I don’t want to.” she purred, her finger trailing down his neck.

“What do you want from me?” he hissed.

She licked her lips as she put a finger to his lip, silencing him.

Love me like you say you do.

“You’re going to die, you know.” 

He chuckles lightly, a weak smile forming on his face. “You don’t need to tell me again.”

She glares at him, trying her best not to hit him. “Take this seriously.”

He sighs, staring at the ceiling intently. She shifts in the chair, uncomfortable to be in a hospital. The smell of bleach lingers all over the place, the stench unbearable.

The man studies her angry expression, watching as her eyes dart around the place, trying to avoid his gaze.

“You’d think in this situation you would be a good sister.” he says bluntly.

She freezes, her eyes landing on him.

“I’m sorry.” the girl says after a few moments.

He gives her a small smile and nods slowly. 

“It’s just difficult.” the woman says abruptly.

Her brother arches an eyebrow at her. “Difficult?”

“Difficult to accept what’s going on.” she replies.

“I see. You knew that this would happen eventually, did you not?”

“I did. I tried to ignore it.”

His lips form a frown as she glances at her brother with a tired expression.

“It’ll be alright.” he says softly, trying to find the correct words to comfort his little sister.

She shakes her head, mumbling. “How would you know?”

He laughs, patting her on the head. “I’m your older brother. I always know.”

The girl forces a smile, relief washing over her. As the two converse, thoughts occupy her mind, but she can’t seem to get rid of the dreadful feeling that grips her heart.

May 5, 1944
The feeling of being isolated; I loathe it. We are forced to work, only because of our identities. It angers me. I cannot change myself; I cannot simply take off a mask and shout “Surprise!” These people here have done nothing wrong. Homosexuals, Gypsies, Jews, it doesn’t matter. We are who we are. We can’t change that.

The woman in her mid twenties closes the diary, using it to fan herself. She sighs loudly, warily eyeing the others that occupy the barrack. There are many people here; too many to fit in the grotesque place. The brunette shifts uncomfortably on the straw covered bed. It’s clear that she does not want to be here.

May 20, 1944
It’s less crowded, but I’m uncertain of whether that is good news. Many people have died because of starvation. They barely feed us, only enough to get by. We work everyday, eat these plain meals, and sleep in these vile barracks. Staying here is dreadful. 

She narrows her eyebrows, pursing her lips together. The woman observes the others that live in the barrack. Some are lying on the bed, their bodies completely still. The woman squints, pondering on whether they are deceased. She shivers, trying to get rid of the dark thoughts that cloud her mind.

June 4, 1944
There’s not enough food. We are starving. It seems everyday there is another lifeless body being discarded. It no longer affects me. 

The brunette sighs softly, frowning.  The girl has lost an excessive amount of weight.  She wonders if she would be able to recognize herself if a mirror was placed in front of her. The soldiers march into the barrack, eyeing the occupants with disgust. The others that stay in the barrack are alert, watching the soldiers carefully.  She shakes her head, knowing that they are only here to discard another corpse.

July 7, 1944
I’ve given up. The others look at me, their eyes full of despair. I’d like to assure them that we will be free soon, but I can’t bring myself to please them by telling sickening lies. Perhaps it was better to just accept my fate from the beginning. It’s horrible to say this; even in this situation, but I wish to be gone from here. When living is even crueler than death, is it so wrong to hope that tomorrow will be the last?

“I swear, Kevin. I wasn’t.”

“I think I know what I saw.”

Panic rushed through her as she tried to think of an excuse.

“No, it’s really not what you think.”

Kevin clenched his jaw, taking a deep breath.

“Don’t insult me.” he began, “I saw you with him yesterday. I’m not stupid. You two were kissing. What else could you have been doing? What else am I supposed to think?”

“I’m so sorry.” she whispered, a tear falling from her face. “I’m sorry.”

The anger melted away, a pained look on his face.

“Why?” he asked quietly, “You could have told me. Did I do something wrong? Did you not want me anymore?”

The girl wiped her tears away, inhaling deeply. “That guy; he doesn’t mean anything to me, okay? That whole thing didn’t mean anything. I still love you.”

“That didn’t mean anything to you?” Does that mean you don’t care about me either? Am I just a playtoy? How can you say you love me when you cheated on me?” he hissed, turning away from her, opening the door.

“Kevin, please.” she cried, her hand reaching out to him. “It won’t ever happen again. I promise.”

He stared at her, his blank expression unaffected by her desperate pleas. He shook his head, leaving the girl as he slammed the door.

I don’t anticipate change from you.

I will only go with you, a fantasy that isn’t far away
To this world full of imagination

She shivered, rubbing her arms as her teeth chattered. The girl looked around, a deserted space surrounding her. The snow fell lightly, tiny snowflakes touching her skin. There was something about this place. She was in the middle of nowhere, but she felt relaxed, comforted by the silence. A bit confused, the woman walked around, shaking as she rubbed her hands together. A smile grew on her face as she saw a large mansion.

“Where am I?” she asked loudly, not expecting an answer.

She flinched, her eyes widening as a figure appeared in front of her suddenly. He smiled, walking towards her. He reached out his hand to her, waiting patiently as she hesitated, grabbing it.

“I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Who are you? Where am I?”

He squeezed her hand gently, flashing a smile.

Welcome to Neverland.

You are to behave properly, do you understand me?

She sighed wearily, earning a glare from her mother.

“Sit up.” her mother muttered under her breath.

She fixed her posture; her chin held high as her father spoke.

“About the alliance…” he continued, watching his daughter wearily as she tuned him out.

The alliance.

She bit the inside of her cheek, her eyes drifting around the decorated room. She looked forward, face to face with the man that would soon be her husband. He was a warrior. A respected one, at that. Her parents thought it was best for her to wed him. He could protect her if anything happened. But she saw through her parents’ concern. They only wanted an alliance. Guaranteed protection for their home.

She listened to her father negotiate, securing the alliance. The girl winced a bit, frowning as her soon to be husband saw. He looked away, sighing quietly.

They would get married.

Maybe she would fall in love with him. Perhaps she would hate him.

But it didn’t matter. She was a tool; a war pawn. Not a person. She pursed her lips, unable to accept the harsh truth.

She would never be anything else.

There was a loud noise coming from the living room; glass breaking. The woman stared at the broken vase with a vacant expression.

“Oops…” she mumbled, picking up the broken pieces with her bare hands. The glass grazed her skin, creating small cuts. The girl examined them, her eyes cloudy.

“Is everything okay?” her friend asks, curiously walking into the living room. He sees a small amount of blood on her hands and immediately rushes over to her.

“Your hand…” he mutters, crouching next to her.

She doesn’t know why, but she tightens her grip on the shards of glass, acting as if the pain was nothing. He looks at her as if she’s gone insane.

“What are you doing?!” he asks, grabbing her wrist. She stops, staring at him for a moment. He glances at her, and it seems as her eyes are asking for forgiveness. Ignoring it, he gets bandages, wrapping them around her injured hand.

“It’s been a year…”

She nodded slowly, her eyes tearing up.

“He’s still gone, isn’t he?” the girl asks in a quiet voice.

He can’t seem to get rid of the lump in his throat when he sees her tears fall. Instead, he finds himself warily eyeing the broken glass. It seems as if she was holding her fragile self together this whole time; but as time has gone on, she’s fallen apart.

He slides the materials across the table, watching as she slowly picks up the pen.

“Write.” he says, “Write what’s on your mind.”

Quickly, she scribbles on the paper, turning it so the therapist is able to read it.

‘I have nothing on my mind.’

He frowns, turning it back.

“You can tell me.” he says softly. The woman picks up the writing utensil as she slowly places it on the paper. He looks away for a brief moment, watching as the raindrops race down his window. A shuffle breaks him out of his trance, the piece of paper placed in his hand. The doctor frowns at the scribbles, the black ink soaking into the paper.

‘I’m sor-‘

He quirks his eyebrows as the sentence is crossed out.

‘I need you to’

He purses his lip as she shifts in the seat, playing with her fingers. Everything on the paper had been crossed out.

“What do you want me to do?”

She grabs the paper, writing so hard he fears the paper might tear.

‘I can’t tell you. But it clouds my mind.’

“I need you to tell me,” he tells her quietly, leaning in, “what do you need me to do?”

He stares into the eyes he had fallen in love with. The eyes that mesmerized him. Silence fills the room as she stares at him with those blank, dull eyes that had once been happy. She opens her mouth, speaking for the first time in months, though it’s barely above a whisper. Her voice cracks.

“Save me.”

I was scared. Terrified.

But he wasn’t.

We were having a child.

I wanted children, but knowing that I would be responsible for someone’s life? I couldn’t think about it. But I was much younger and ignorant back then. I smiled to myself as my children played with their father, tackling him as he hugged them.

It was scary. Definitely.

But it was worth it all, just to see them smile.